Ruz Hoff, a German-based social worker, certified Child Protection Specialist, Social Empowerment Advocate & Coach, and Speaker, originally from Uganda with Rwandan-Ugandan heritage, recently shared her perspective on why she has chosen not to marry an African man after years of living in Germany.
In a candid discussion on her YouTube channel, Ruz Hoff expressed her belief that she does not fit the traditional mold of an African wife. She highlighted physical attributes, mentioning the expectation for women to possess ample curves, particularly emphasizing the significance of a well-shaped derrière, colloquially referred to as a ‘Nyash’. Reflecting on her own physique, she acknowledged not meeting these conventional standards.
Beyond physical appearance, Ruz Hoff addressed cultural differences, citing the rigid beliefs prevalent in African societies, particularly concerning gender roles. She expressed discomfort with the notion of men being regarded as absolute authorities within the family, a sentiment commonly reinforced through terms like ‘my king’ or ‘my queen’. Ruz Hoff firmly rejected this hierarchical dynamic, advocating instead for equality and mutual respect in partnerships.
While acknowledging the importance of certain traditional roles, she stressed her reluctance to adopt a subservient position in a relationship. Ruz Hoff lamented the prevalent mistreatment of married women in African societies, where they are often relegated to subordinate roles. This discrepancy between her values and prevailing cultural norms solidified her decision not to pursue a marriage with an African man.
In essence, Ruz Hoff’s decision reflects her desire for a partnership based on mutual respect, equality, and compatibility with her personal beliefs and values, rather than conforming to societal expectations rooted in cultural traditions.
