It’s uncommon to find a woman willing to allow her husband to marry a second wife, especially in a world where monogamy is the standard. Yet Dr. Doris Nyokangi, a Kenyan woman battling cancer, made a courageous and selfless choice. Aware of her illness and its limitations on her ability to care for her family, she told her husband he could remarry—but only under one strict condition.
Doris was deeply worried about her husband and children’s future. Knowing she might not live long enough to continue caring for them, she suggested that her husband take a second wife so he wouldn’t grow old alone. However, she made it clear that this could only happen after their youngest daughter completed university. In her book, When Health Slips Away: A Twelve-Year Journey with Lung Cancer, she recalls telling him, “Baba Watoto, when I am gone, please consider getting married again so that you do not suffer from loneliness.”
Her decision was largely influenced by the memory of her own father, who suffered immense loneliness after losing his wife. Doris didn’t want her husband to endure the same pain. She and her husband had been married since 1982 and had four children together.
In 2014, after enduring five rounds of chemotherapy and four radiation sessions, she had grown extremely weak, losing weight and becoming pale. Although her condition seemed to improve briefly, her cancer returned in 2018, prompting more treatments. Six years later, she is now cancer-free, with no signs of the disease.
Dr. Nyokangi, who was a lecturer at Egerton University from 2015 to 2023, has since turned her focus to educating the public about supporting cancer patients, using her personal journey with chemotherapy to inform and inspire others. She admits that she spent too long in denial about her illness. At one point, she even wrote her own eulogy, convinced she was dying. But accepting her condition marked a turning point, helping her adopt a more positive outlook.
Her battle with cancer began in mid-2012 during a trip to Kenya for her sister’s burial. The morning after the ceremony, she visited her mother-in-law and, while chatting, suddenly felt a strange sensation in her stomach. It felt like a liquid was dripping from her chest to her abdomen, and the pain was so intense she couldn’t stay or eat.
She soon traveled to South Africa, where she had access to medical care, and began what would become a long and difficult journey. It took almost a year for doctors to diagnose her with lung cancer. The news was devastating, and the fear of chemotherapy, based on stories she had heard, only made it harder to cope.
Despite the emotional and physical toll, Dr. Nyokangi’s strength, foresight, and willingness to prioritize her family’s future make her story one of resilience, love, and hope.
